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I'd say, if you have friends that care about you (yeah, right...), you should confide in them. if they're true friends, they'll sympathize with you.

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It is often a good idea to not act on feelings until you have had a chance to rationally think about the problem You don't want your actions or words to create a worse situation.

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at the end of the day are you content? are confident enough knowing if you do say something will not cause any problems for you or any conflict that could have been avoided.
You should express yourself, don't burst out, although that's the way it is sometimes, when you all of a sudden become a rock band groupie, you express yourself in clothes, music, friends and being involved.

Do so without regret, responsibly and maturity .

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l Think like an adult, and take the burden of responsibility at an early age, try sharing your feelings to an person of mature age, think they will just laugh it off you really take your concern seriously?
No kid really is, unless they are adults - why bother? you are 1/ giving someone an excuse to do there job which is not what you wanted, persecuted for having a problem - see it's all in YOUR head.

and second - if you handle it like the adults, you only look as scared and bitter as they are, after all - is it not preached by psychs that all men are created equal?

....hiiii, Oz

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*** yp chap. 2 pp. 18-25 Why Don?t My Parents Understand Me? ***

Why Don?t My Parents Understand Me?

IT?S only human to want to be understood. And if your parents are critical of?or uninterested in?things you love or think are important, you can feel very frustrated.

Sixteen-year-old Robert feels that his father does not understand his choice of music. ?All he does is scream and say, ?Turn it off!?? said Robert. ?So I turn it and him off.? Many youths similarly withdraw emotionally into their own private world when parental understanding seems to be lacking. In one extensive study of youths, 26 percent of the youths surveyed admitted, ?I try to stay away from home most of the time.?

A huge rift, or gap, between youths and parents thus exists in many homes. What causes it?

?Power? Versus ?Gray-Headedness?

Proverbs 20:29 states: ?The beauty of young men [or women] is their power.? This strength, or ?power,? though, can lay the groundwork for all sorts of conflicts between you and your parents. The proverb continues: ?And the splendor of old men is their gray-headedness.? Your parents may not literally be ?gray-headed,? but they are older and tend to view life differently. They realize that not every situation in life has a happy ending. Bitter personal experience may have tempered the idealism they once had as youths. Because of this wisdom born of experience??gray-headedness,? as it were?they just may not share your enthusiasm over certain matters.

Says young Jim: ?My parents (depression-era children) feel that money should be saved to buy or spend on things of importance. But I am living right now too.?.?.?. I want to travel a lot.? Yes, between one?s youthful ?power? and one?s parents? ?gray-headedness? may lie a huge gap. Many families are thus bitterly divided over issues such as dress and grooming, behavior with the opposite sex, use of drugs and alcohol, curfews, associates, and chores. The generation gap can be bridged. But before you can expect your parents to understand you, you must try to understand them.

Parents Are Human Too

?When I was younger, I naturally felt that Mom was ?perfect? and didn?t have any of the weaknesses and feelings I had,? says John. Then his parents divorced, leaving his mother to care for seven children alone. John?s sister April recalls: ?I remember seeing her cry because of the frustration of trying to keep up with everything. Then I realized we had a wrong viewpoint. She can?t do everything always at the right time and in the right way. We saw that she had feelings and was human too.?

Recognizing that your parents are simply humans with feelings like yours is a big step toward your understanding?them. They might, for example, feel very insecure about their ability to rear you properly. Or, feeling overwhelmed by all the moral dangers and?temptations you face, they may tend to?overreact?to things at times. They also may be?contending?with physical, financial, or emotional hardships. A father,?for instance, may hate his job but may never complain. So when his child says, ?I can?t stand school,? it is no wonder that rather than respond sympathetically, he retorts, ?What?s the matter with you? You kids have it easy!?

Take a ?Personal Interest?

How, then, can you find?out how your parents feel? By??keeping?an eye, not in personal?interest?upon just your own matters, but also in personal interest upon those of the others.? (Philippians 2:4) Try asking your mother what she was like as a teenager. What were her feelings, her goals? ?Chances are,? said ?Teen magazine, ?that if she feels that you?re interested in, and aware of the reasons for some of her feelings, she?ll try to be more aware of yours.? The same would no doubt be true of your father.

If a conflict arises, do not be quick to accuse your folks of being insensitive. Ask yourself: ?Was my parent not feeling well or worried about something? Was he or she perhaps hurt over some thoughtless deed or word on my part? Do they simply misunderstand what I mean?? (Proverbs 12:18) Showing such empathy is a good start at closing that generation gap. Now you can work on getting your parents to understand you! Many youths, though, make that extremely difficult. How?

Living a Double Life

Seventeen-year-old Vickie was doing just that by secretly dating a boy against her parents? wishes. She was sure her parents just wouldn?t understand her feelings for her boyfriend. Naturally, the gap between her and them widened. ?We were making each other miserable,? says Vickie. ?I hated coming home.? She decided she would get married?anything to get away from home!

Many youths similarly live double lives?doing things unknown to and forbidden by their parents?and then bemoan the fact that their parents ?do not understand them?! Fortunately, Vickie was helped by an older Christian woman who told her: ?Vickie, just think about your parents?.?.?. They raised you. If you can?t handle this relationship, how can you handle one with someone of your own age that hasn?t put 17 years of love into you??

Vickie took an honest look at herself. She soon realized that her parents were right and that her own heart was wrong. She terminated her association with her boyfriend and began closing the breach between her and her parents. If you have similarly kept an important part of your life secret from your parents, isn?t it time to be honest with them??See insert ?How Can I Tell My Parents??

Take the Time to Talk

?It was the best time I ever had with my dad!? said John of a trip he and his father made together. ?I?d never spent six hours alone with him in my whole life. Six hours up, six hours back. No car radio. We really talked. It?s as if we discovered each other. There?s more to him than I thought. It made us friends.? Why not similarly try to have a good talk with your mom or dad?regularly?

It also helps to make friends with other adults. Recalls Vickie: ?I had absolutely no rapport with older ones. But I made a point of tagging along with my parents when they associated with other adults. In time I developed friendships with these who were my parents? age, and this gave me a more rounded outlook. It was easier to carry on conversations with my parents. The atmosphere at home improved dramatically.?

Associating with those who have gained wisdom over the years will also prevent you from adopting a narrow, limited outlook on life, which can happen if you keep company only with your youthful peers.?Proverbs 13:20.

Communicate Your Feelings

?I talk straight from my heart and speak sincerely the knowledge coming from my lips,? said young Elihu. (Job 33:3, The Holy Bible in the Language of Today, by William Beck) Is that how you talk with your parents when you clash over such matters as clothes, curfews, or music?

Young Gregory felt that his mom was totally unreasonable. He coped with the heated conflict between them by staying away from home as much as he could. But then he acted on the advice of some Christian elders. He says, ?I began to tell Mom how I felt. I told her why I wanted to do things and did not just assume she knew. Often I poured out my heart and explained that I wasn?t trying to do anything wrong and how bad I felt because she treated me like a little child. Then she began to understand and slowly things got a whole lot better.?

You may likewise find that speaking ?straight from the heart? can help settle many misunderstandings.

Handling Disagreements

This does not mean, however, that your parents will immediately come to view things your way. You must therefore keep a grip on your emotions. ?All his spirit [impulses] is what a stupid one lets out, but he that is wise keeps it calm to the last.? (Proverbs 29:11) Calmly discuss the merits of your viewpoint. Stick to the issues instead of arguing that ?everybody else does it!?

At times your parents are going to say no. This does not mean they do not understand you. They may simply want to forestall disaster. ?My mother is strict on me,? admits one 16-year-old girl. ?It bothers me that she tells me I can?t do something, or [that I must] come into the house at a certain time. But deep down inside, she really cares.?.?.?.?she looks out for me.?

The security and warmth that mutual understanding brings to a family is beyond words. It makes the home a haven in times of anguish. But real effort is needed on the part of everyone involved.

For the book ?Questions Young People Ask?Answers That Work? go to, www.watchtower.org. Or write to Jehovah?s Witnesses, 25 Columbia Heights, Brooklyn, NY 11201-2483. Or phone your local congregation. You can do this with no oblations whatsoever.